In Sin's cradle was I raised.

Raised to ruin,
So I kept ruining.
Confusing love with lust.
Thus ruining its essence by demanding sex as a concrete evidence of love.
Confusing joy with pleasure.
And so preached a life solely  devoted to material chase.
Thus ruining the essence of life's purpose.

Raised in fear,
So I fretted.
So much afraid of the future that I forgot to enjoy the present.
So much afraid of what people would say that I spurred the love of Christ.
So much fearful of losing my worldly possessions that I forgot they could not go with me to the life beyond.
So much afraid of death that I never took to chance to hear Jesus tell others
"Because I live, you will Live"

Raised to fail.
So I became chief among the fallen.
Masked my failure at doing good by insisting that man can never be Altruistic.
Masked my failure to love my wife by insisting all women are to be always handled with a strong hand.
Masked my failures to trust my husband by insisting that all men are dogs.
Masked my failures to forgive others by insisting that total forgiveness lies in the realm of the gods.
Masked my failures at having true joy by creating an illusion for everybody who looked up to me for answers.

Coke, Crack, Meth, Xcstsy, Weed?
I did them all.
With a life empty and dull like mine.
Who didn't?

Tall, Short, Caucasian, Ebony?
I slept with them all.
With a need to sustain my dopamine 'highs'.
Who didn't?

Jesus pieces, Maybachs Jordans, Gold chains?
I rocked them all.
With a dire need to sustain social acceptance.
Who didn't?

Zaron, Mary Kay, Allure?
I wore them all
With a need to cover up my facial tears
Who didn't? 

No one cared
Or so I thought.

Till I met Him.

Who through ages past remains the same.
Who healed the sick and raised the lame.
Who touched my heart and healed my pain.
Who bore my sins and shunned the shame.
Who, in the book of life, wrote my name.
Who, in the temple of death, removed my frame.

Conduit of God's love I have become.
Complete in Him through grace.
Culled from the fatted cows for slaughter.
Called to be His own.
And sent forth to tell you these words over and over.

God loves you
God loves you
And Jesus loves you

okonta kosi